David Strassman has returned to Tasmania with his new show, The Chocolate Diet.

Hi David. How would you describe yourself?

I’m a grown man who plays with dolls. And you know what? I also touch them inappropriately – because that’s how I make them work!

How much work and effort goes into performing a ventriloquist show?

A lot of effort.

What is crazy is, I have literally just arrived in Melbourne to rehearse for this Tassie tour, which is basically a ‘Remember How to Do a Show’ tour, because we were cancelled one week into our Sydney tour in March 2020 [due to the outbreak of COVID-19]. I haven’t performed since!

But, you know, there’s so much. For my show, there’s a year of writing – I’m on script number 27! I have 150 lighting instruments, there are 87 sound cues, there are computers, there’s robotics, there are puppets – there is a whole complement to make this as professional and produced like a musical, like Wicked.

So, it’s not just a guy standing there, playing with a puppet. There’s so much that goes into my shows.

How does it feel making audiences laugh?

I’m blessed!

Before the curtain rises [at a show], I’m standing behind the curtain and you can hear a sold-out audience. They’re murmuring and they’re all excited and they’ve paid good money – and they’re there to see me. I would say 60% of them are returnees and fans; 40% are new for every single performance. Which is crazy, but it’s great.

I am blessed that I make people laugh for a living. It’s so much fun.

How would you describe The Chocolate Diet in your own words?

This is a real fun show.

I basically hold up a mirror to society’s dietary ills without preaching.

You know, when I first came to Australia in 1991, there was no trading on the weekends. Coles wasn’t open; Safeway [Woolworths] closed at 5 p.m. on Friday and opened at 8 a.m. on Monday. 7-Eleven shops were beginning to open, but they weren’t 24/7. There was Maccas; there was Hungry Jack’s; there was KFC. There wasn’t the servos that you find now that are open 24/7 and have row after row after row of sugary drinks and crisps. So, with the availability of such shite food, Western civilisations are losing the ability to be healthy.

With Ted E. Bare, he loves chocolate, so he’s gaining weight. I gently tell him that he needs to eat healthier. He goes on a diet and he ends up becoming so impossibly thin, it’s disgusting. Then he goes the other way and becomes so obese that it’s disgusting. So, he goes on this journey of eating crap, then eating healthy, then eating crap. But there’s no preaching in the show.

If it’s Ted E. Bare, it’s about diet. Grandpa Fred is addicted to drugs. My beaver puppet can’t stop telling old jokes. Every puppet has its own issues, in this show – and it’s funny. It’s a laugh every ten seconds!

Which of your puppets is your favourite and why?

Well, they all so unique and different, I don’t really have a favourite. But Buttons, the alcoholic clown, he’s probably my favourite. He’s just so drunk and so pissed all the time. People love him.

You are returning to Tasmania for the first time in 7 years. How does it feel to be coming back after so long?

It’s great. I’ve been coming to Tassie since the ‘90s. I’ve fished Cradle Mountain; I’ve been to Lands End; I’ve been in the forests there; I’ve been to the Lodge and fed Tassie Devils. I’ve been all over the place!

Tassie actually reminds me a lot of southern Alaska. It has the same long sunsets, the same grey weather, and the same beautiful blue skies. It’s just beautiful.

Is there a particular place in Tasmania you like?

Yeah, the Salamanca Markets on Saturday mornings!

You can catch David Strassman in Tasmania between 4 and 7 May.