Tasmania is set to leverage its reputation for quality food production with the establishment of the state’s first dog meat production facility.
International player Elwood’s Organic Dog Meat today announced plans for the 17 hectare farm near Campbell Town.
Business owner Kane Major said he was excited about the opportunity to expand.
“We’ve been family-owned and operated for over two generations, so that’s the dedication we bring to dog farming,” he said. “We’re very confident that in Tasmanian conditions, which generate so much fine produce, we can grow the best, most sustainably-raised dog meat available.”
The property, a former sheep farm, already has its own licensed slaughterhouse. Work is currently under way to make some modification to the corrals, pens and slaughterhouse line to accommodate slightly smaller and occasionally more aggressive animals.
“Size is not everything in the dog meat trade,” said Major. “We have to respond to increasing sophistication in the market. In some parts of the world for example they prefer to roast dogs whole so we’ve been breeding hairless dachsunds specifically for live export into that market segment.
“The American preference meanwhile is for chunky steaks so we expect to start with a herd of about 5000 labradors. We’ll be processing those dogs at an age of about 18 months to produce tender steaks exclusively for an key US importer who is eagerly waiting for our product.”
Elwood’s will also make available a limited range of premium products for sale in Tasmania.
“We love to, you know, share the love so we’ll have our signature lab steaks, pug bacon, hickory-smoked kelpie and other in-house smallgoods, and even a versatile what-dog-is-that Mixed Mutt MinceTM,” he said confidently. “We’re sure Tasmanians will enjoy curling up on the couch with a warm bowl of dog in winter.”
The company also hopes to bark up a storm in restaurant dining on the island.
“Really, our Irish wolfhound and garlic sausages are to die for; they’ll go fabulously with some solid Tasmanian pinot noir and we expect restaurants to be very keen to offer them as part of the state’s sophisticated gastronomy.”
The MMM mince product, Major noted, would be produced from local dogs no longer wanted by their owners.
“Rather than the uncertainty of giving up your dog to a shelter, you can bring it to us and we’ll recycle it to produce sustainable food, a portion of which we will can and donate to food banks.”
Who’s a good steak then?! Elwood’s is looking forward to working with local chefs to develop original local recipes for their products.
The businessman was at pains to to assure that unlike some other farms that have given the industry a poor reputation, Elwood’s pups never receive antibiotics and are fed only organic, soy-free feed.
“They have access to green pastures during the summer months, and in winter are kept protected indoors in concrete-floored sheds at a free range density of two per square metre, fully in accordance with industry best practice,” Major explained.
While the firm would not reveal the projected profitability of the business, they did indicate that they were expecting some revenue from carbon credits.
“Effectively we are are replacing ruminant sheep, which produces lots of methane, with dogs that produce far less,” explained Major. “This is a win-win: we’ll be seeking to sell the greenhouse gas reduction credits, plus our customers will be happy to know their meat purchase is much friendlier to the climate.”
The company also promised to plant a tree for every thousand dogs processed.
Elwood’s are still waiting on a council permit for the dog farm, after having recently submitted all required documents for the development application.
“There may be some minor noise and smell issues, but we have a plan to deal with those,” said Major. “We will work with the Environmental Health officers to remediate any problems they identify during the required inspections.
“In any case we expect the community will fully support an organic food production enterprise that offers fun, sustainable jobs for locals.
“If you think you’d be good at humanely slashing the throat of a 30-kilogram labrador, bleeding it to death and skinning it, we have a place for you.”
Major said that employment in the dog meat industry was very safe, due to the standard practice of removing all dog teeth at birth. Those interested in applying for employment should seek further information at the Elwood’s Organic Dog Meat website.
If you’ve followed the link to the Elwood’s Organic Dog Meat website, you’ll now understand what this is about. This is satire, intended to put a different light on how other animals – sheep, cattle, pigs, chickens and so on – are treated by the industries that exploit them. And the desensitised language and ‘farmwashing’ that is used around their operations.
Simply put, all these industries are cruel. Industries that systematically exploit sentient beings’ lives and deaths solely for profit do not have an interest in their welfare.
So no need to send us death threats. If you’re angry, direct your rage toward ending all animal abuse. You can also consider how your own choices support, or not, animals being brought into the world solely to endure miserable lives.
