The truth? You can handle the truth, so by Barnaby-woo we’re gon’ give it ya. Here’s how the new Rockliff Cabinet lines up after the reshuffle.
Jeremy Rockliff MP Premier
Minister for Looking Over His Shoulder
Minister for Grandiose Promises
Minister for Wishing He Was Somewhere Else
Michael Ferguson Deputy Premier
Minister for Lying About Debt
Minister for Crumbling Infrastructure
Minister for Wringing His Hands About Transport
Elise Archer Attorney-General
Minister for Prison Overcrowding
Minister for Hey-Look-Over-There-We-Have-A-Screen Industry
Minister for Representing Very Skinny People
Guy Barnett MP
Minister for Fudging Health Statistics
Minister for Quantum Hydrogen Megasomething Gargleblastermoneyflusher of the Nation
Minister for Being Embarrassed About Energy Prices
Felix Ellis MP
Minister for Disasters of His Own Making
Minister for Skills Shortages
Minister for Throwing Money at Anachronisms Like Horse- & Dog-Racing
Roger Jaensch MP
Minister Representing All Ministers Who’ve Never Done Anything
Minister for Illiteracy
Minister For Against the Environment
Minister for Continuing to Ignore Aboriginal Affairs
Madeleine Ogilvie MP
Minister for Being the Minister Unable to Be Hidden in Any Other Portfolios
Minister for Warmongering Industries
Jo Palmer MLC
Minister for Various Kinds of Entrenched Animal Abuse
Minister for Lack of Access to Services
Nic Street MP
Minister for Licking AFL Footy Boots
Minister for Getting Chummy with Property Developers
Minister for Ham-Fisting Local Government
Leonie Hiscutt MLC
Under-Secretary of Bearing So Little Talent She Didn’t Cop A Ministry Even After 10 Years in Parliament And Even Among This Dissembling Donkeycade of Plonkergronks
