JARVIS COCKER
Meeting opened 11.00 am, Thursday 27th August 2009.

Big John: (speaks to Wayne) Have you faxed the preliminary final report to the ASX yet?

Wayne: No, the fax machine’s not working.

Big John: Can’t we get it fixed?

Wayne: Not before Monday, don’t worry, I’ll bring one in from home. By the way, the numbers don’t look good.

Big John: What do you mean, they don’t look good?

Wayne: Well revenue’s down. Profit’s down. We still owe the bank $650 million. And we’ve run out of cash again.

Big John: Didn’t we offload a few cases of that pinot to the cleanskin company?

Wayne: Yes, but that only covered the interest bill for a couple of days.

Big John: I know – let’s ring that guy from the mainland, you know, the one trying to sell some trees?

Independent director: Elders?

Big John: Yes, that’s him. Buy some of his trees, and do a capital raising, but raise about $45 million extra. That should keep us going.

Independent director: What about due diligence?

Big John: No, I don’t think he works there anymore.

Independent director: No, I mean an in depth investigation into the value of the Elders assets.

Big John: Don’t be a fuckwit. We’ve been cutting down trees for years. What do Elders know that we don’t?

Wayne: What should I tell the ASX?

Big John: Why should we tell them anything?

Wayne: It’s a requirement under Corporations Law.

Big John: What, like that stupid continuous disclosure requirement?

Wayne: Sort of…

Big John: Well tell them something. Give Rachel a call, too. Tell her it was good work on the Scottsdale thing.

Independent director: What about the pulp mill?

Big John: What about it?

Independent director: Well we told the exchange in June that we’d finalised a preferred joint venture partner.

Big John: Well tell them that again. It worked last time. Get that Matt from the PR company to talk it up.

Wayne: John, the guy from ANZ keeps ringing. He’s called 17 times this morning.

Big John: Tell him I’m out of the country finalising finance for the mill.

Big John: Any thing else? Where should we go for lunch?

Meeting closed 11.03am

(to be continued)