Confession Number One

Bless me father, for I ‘ave sinned……it’s been a mumfff since me last confession father and ‘ere are me sins.

After the ‘ole school voted for a new mob a prefects, I fort I’d lost my job as ‘ead boy and I tol’ ’em at assemby and that other boy, Willy could be ‘ead boy, ‘coz ‘e did get more of the school to back him ‘an me. I was pretty upset but I didn’t show it mind!

I told ’em all ‘e could ‘ave me job, father….but I lied !

When I finished givin’ me speech, all me ol’ mates got real dark on me – you know ’em, father – Airdy an’ Waffler an’ Greenie, an’ that big, moody boy Brenton, they was not ‘appy. They told me to ‘ang in there and that’s when I come ta see ya, father after school last week….’member?

It all got too ‘ard father, they wasn’t ‘appy AND THEM’S ME MATES!

‘Member I tol’ ya that I changed me mind, I wann’d ta keep that job! I didn’ wanna let that boy Willy be ‘ead boy after all, ‘cos now this goody-two-shoes Nic says he’s gunna be me friend. Big surprise, big surprise father! So I tol’ ya father, that Nic and his bunch backed me. You seemed ‘appy, Nic and I started to play togeva on our bikes ‘n all.

Course Willy wasn’t ‘appy, father – and ‘is dad ain’t neither. I know you ‘ad a quiet word to Willy an’ told ‘im that I ‘ad a better chance to stay on as ‘ead boy ‘cos I tol’ ya that Nic and I would sort out the school yard trouble better ‘an young Willy.

But then father, this bludger Nic – never really trusted ‘im – he comes to see me, an’ brings a sheila along! – and they tells me they wants ol’ Nic to be a bloody school prefect, fer cryin’ out loud!! Jeeezzzz. Oh! sorry father, sorry father! I’m goin’ from bad to worst!

So’s wha’ do I do? I gives this bludger ‘a guernsey, but I don’t tell ‘im wot to ‘es gotta do…..w’ever ‘es arfa or marfa! Well ‘ol Nic an’ his bunch, they don’t like that one bit.

But that don’t phase me, ‘cos I know Willy’s mates don’t like ol’ Nic’s mob an’ Willy wont fall out with them big boys, Bradley and Eric. Next fing I know’s that big bright sheila, Sue blabs that mates of ol’ Nic is talkin’ to little Willy’s mates and that maybe you, father could give Willy a go after all!

Father, I knows I did the wrong fing in promisin’ Willy ‘e could do it and then tellin’ you I changed me mind. You gave me the nod father….I fort you winked father! But I did break me promise t’ the school.

Cripes, if ol’ Nic teams-up with Willy’s mob, father. This school could change fer’ever!

That bully-boy sin-bin idea I ‘ad last year – after that red ‘ead boy, Paul stuffed up; that jus’ might happen now with Willy & Nic…Strewth!!

Could Willy an’ I both be ‘ead boys, father? That’d piss that ol’ devil Nic off ! Oh, sorry father!

Jeeezz father, I never ‘new lying could ‘urt so much!

Confession Number Two

Bless me father, because I feel might have transgressed…it has been one month – to the day – since my last confession father, and these are my failings.

At the outset may I tell you that I’m envious of the newly-installed school captain David because he’s cheated the school.

I know he had his backers and fans but when he promised you, Sir and the whole school that he would let me be captain if I got more of the pupils to back me, gosh, I got so angry Sir. That’s why I’m here.

You told us that hate hurts the hater most, but I can’t seem to get over it.

On top of all that Sir, this David boy got a second wind when that other chap Nick stated to be friendly with him all of a sudden. What a change – they’ve been calling each other names for years! Gosh, it gets me upset even talking about it Sir.

On his own Nick is a pretty civil kid – we come from the same neighbourhood Sir and I think I like him but after Nick started riding his bike with David and then that David boy went to see you Sir to say he wouldn’t give me a go at school captain, I snapped.

It seems so unfair Sir! All my friends tell me to hold my head up high and let these two play their silly games, but I’m sure school morale will be affected Sir.

A couple of my friends, Bradley and Eric told me to stay away from Nick and his friends; those two really, really don’t like Nick’s attitude.

It’s all too much Sir, because I really like this school; it’s the same school my dad was prefect at. Dad isn’t happy either Sir.

We all think it’s terrific when we each get a chance to talk at assembly and important school functions. But I worry for the school Sir. I hope the school isn’t damaged because we boys can’t talk to each other.

Part of me likes Nick. I wouldn’t mind playing a game of handball or football with him but I’m scared that my other friends would desert me. Gosh it’s so hard Sir!

Confession Number Three

Gidday father, thanks for giving me this opportunity to tell how I‘m feeling …it has been one heck of month and I’m pretty tired.

I don’t think there’s too much to get off my chest, but I really enjoy these counselling sessions, it helps to clear the air for me.

Now where should I begin? Yes, I always knew I wouldn’t get to be top prefect at the school but I thought I got good support from a swag of the students. When I talked at assembly as a runner up I was happy because my team did pretty well in the circumstances.

David threw everything at me. Those mobile phone text messages really spooked a lot of students. Father, just so you know, I have NEVER been involved in drugs and just because someone gets given a school detention shouldn’t stop them from being part of the place! That was pretty low.

That’s all water under the bridge though,and it was good that Will didn’t do the same thing, I respect him for that.

I kinda thought that David was going to let Will be the No.1 prefect for this year, because that’s what David told the whole school he’d do.

It was close vote for head prefect, no two ways about it.

I just wanted to get back to studying again and hoped for the best. I really don’t understand how we came to this, father.

Seems that David changed his mind about giving up being No. 1 because a rumour went round the school yard that I’d buried the hatchet with David and supported him for head prefect. I knew that you’d talked with David after that rumour and it seems you agreed he could do the job for another year – especially as he was staying on even though he failed last year’s finals.

That seem to make things a whole lot better for David and we went dirt-biking together over the week-end. And oh-yes, there was another time I introduced my friend, Cassy to David in the school yard. Lots of looks.

Will was gob-smacked and part of me understands, somehow I feel a tinge of responsibility.

I hope you understand how hard I’ve tried to get on with Will and his friends…it’s been difficult at times. When you organise the games we do sometimes play pretty well together, especially if some of his mates don’t influence Will too much. He can be a good sort!

But after David got into your ‘good books’ again father, Will seemed to turn nasty with me. Well, that might be too harsh a call, he snubbed me and sort of blamed me for supporting David for top prefect.

David’s called me all sorts of names over the years and some of his friends really dislike me with a vengeance…but somehow despite this shit (sorry for swearing!) it seems that I still haven’t given up on this guy.

Trouble is I like Will too!

Father, you know what I really, really wish for? That’s that the three of us could all be friends! Who cares who No.1 is!

Maybe the students at our school don’t want to see it that way, but I hope you can father; the school’s too important.

Am I making any sense here?

Well, if there’s one thing I feel remorseful for and see as my failing it’s that I didn’t go for a bush walk with Will or played his favourite game, handball. I feel it was up to me to set it up, but I just felt it was Will’s call.

Such a pity for us both. We had a silly stand off. I like Will.

Sometimes, these personal dealings seem so hard.
By Henry Melville with apologies to Catholics and C.J. Dennis