The Grand Coalition

WHAT an undignified shambles it is all becoming.

News of the impending declaration of Wendy Kennedy as Labor MP-in-waiting has caused not a little angst it seems (ALP election brawl looms).

Lots of ALP noses appear to have Snapped severely out of joint.

No reflection on Wendy of course but it reminds ageing Hag of bygone days when the high-profile was the most important aspect of candidates’ credentials.

Remember the days of footy and cricket heroes populating the backbenches. It’s a good old Labor, and sometimes Liberal Party, strategy to snaffle a few votes.

Now, Hag was told this is not the first time that the Mensa members running Labor have struck upon the idea of elevating our Wendy, who it seems is not actually an ALP member (small inconvenience that).

Hag heard over a weekend barbie which became a little frisky following over-indulgence in Green Fairy absinthe that there have been moves in the past to ask Wend onto the TDA board, as it was then, and at one stage to either join or head up Jimbo/Paulie’s Communications Unit.

This is a highly sought-after gal. But perhaps not by some disgruntled rank and file.

Hag remains rather puzzled that Wend is earmarked for Lyons. Wouldn’t have thought she’d be that well known there. But who can doubt the wisdom of the populism masters.

Of course it will be all to no avail.

Hag maintains there will be a hung parliament.

Both Paul and Rene will huff and puff, and say they will not govern in minority or form any association with anyone, let alone those ghastly greens who are the cause of all Tasmania’s ills not to mention Third World poverty, global warming and Brian Lara’s form slump.

You read it here first: As governance hangs in the balance, a second election will be called. Which will be as indecisive as the first.

Look to Germany

Then, a bulb will flash in the minds of Paul and Rene.

Both Great Leaders will look to Germany as the solution to all Tasmania’s problems.

And out of the poll wreckage will emerge The Government of State Unity, a beautiful marriage between Lab and Lib soul-mates.

Just like Germany … where the conservatives of chancellor designate Angela Merkel and the Social Democrats (SPD) put pen to paper last week to form Germany’s first “grand coalition” of the traditional opponents since 1969.

There’s just one problem guys.

For this blueprint to be precisely copied, you need a woman leader.

Well, Hag, unbefuddled by Green Fairy, has just the solution to your dilemma:

Wendy, of course!

• Hag must say Rene sounded a bit rough on ABC Talkback this AM. Definitely on the back foot after a night watching David Nalbandian and reading Mr Cheek: Cheeky: Launched!. Cheeky: First analysis. For all of Cheeky, including extracts: CLICK HERE

Quite apart from the rather inadequate attempt to hurl a bit of oil on the troubled waters, Hag was a tad gobsmacked that in Rene’s view there should not be passion and idealism in politics. He criticised Cheeky for entering politics with a vision for change; eviscerated him for self-flagellation over his failure as leader.

Good heavens, Rene, that’s a worry. What do you want? Soul-less, pragmatic, visionless apparatchiks sold out to the Big End of Town? Oh, right, we’ve got ’em already.

• Hag shares with the Editor a deep dislike for the strangulation of good champagne. Pick up the Merc today (Mon), flick to Wendy’s page (Snapped) and observe the ex-Governor Guy and sundry others grasping their champers glasses with their ghastly maws. For heaven’s hold them by the stem and let the bubbles free!

Read more of Hag’s rambling incoherence: HERE