Academic Humour

Academic Humour

[WARNING: Nerd conversation ahead]

Academics tasked with marking university undergraduate essays often grizzle about the ponderous language uni students use to dress up their essays in an attempt to lend gravitas to their undying prose.

This is an exchange found on the internet between several academics that brings this problem to the fore. Enjoy academics letting off steam, as such…
A: Does anyone else hate the overuse of the phrase “as such”, or am I just being picky?

B: Ipso facto, as such the phrase in and of itself is only overused within certain contingent frames, thus your ‘hate’ as such is often restricted thematically.

C: Not as such.

D: My pet hate is ‘past research shows’.

A: That is the very first sentence of the one I’m marking now.

B: I dislike the use of ‘praxis’ especially in psychology papers and art theory papers.

E: I, for one, can’t stand the use of I, for one. Probably also genetic.

B: I, for one, dislike the liberal use of the word ‘hence’. Hence, I don’t like its overuse in an essay.

A: I have to admit to overuse of “however”. I’m trying to kick the habit.

B: That maybe should have read, ‘However, I have to admit to overuse of “however”…’

A: Also, I have a bit of a semicolon problem.

B: That maybe should have read, ‘Also; I have a bit of a semicolon problem.’

E: I have to say – I find dashes dangerously attractive. And I have a lasting, perfidious, and problematic affection for the Oxford comma.

A: I used to love dashes but my Honours supervisor made me change them to semicolons.

B: However, and therefore, I hence use it as such; ‘I use the Oxford comma’. Past research shows that I have used it – ipso facto that has been my praxis.

A: GNARRRRGGGGHHHH!!!

E: Past research shows, however, that past usage does not ipso facto define praxis; it is not, therefore, something that I, for one, could, or hence should, endorse.

B: ‘Head Explodes’
Jon Sumby