The gang-rape of a female student in a moving bus in Delhi last year brought the subject of rape to the public notice yet again.
Each time such an incident occurs, in any country in the world, it causes outrage in the community.
However being a victim of rape also carries a social stigma almost as widely: the girl asked for it by wearing the wrong clothes, she has loose morals, she didn’t say no, or she was in the wrong place.
Many rape victims are treated badly by their families: pregnancy causes double punishment, with the perceived “sins” of the mother visited on the child if it survives. Rape is not treated the same as other crimes; judgement of the victim, even to death, can occur long before any judgement is passed on the culprit, if at all.
Rape is not an issue that can be fixed by harsher penalties, a better justice system, or a change in policing methods.
It requires a change in thinking, by those who automatically see themselves as the dominant sex - men. Society finds compassion for the rape victim, but then society fails to support her. Why? Basic aspects of our society - religion and the workplace - constantly re-enforce male dominance. Religions do not allow men and women to perform equal roles; even Australia continues to fail to employ or pay on an equal basis; unmarried mothers suffer from discrimination in the workplace and community. It is not just about physical strength: women are often perceived as less capable in an occupation that they are well able to perform.
Recently in Aceh, Indonesia, a law was announced forbidding women to ride astride on motorbikes. The reason given was loose morals in society - as with rape, women are judged, by men, as the cause of the problem and become the victims while doing nothing wrong.
Prostitution is reputed to be the oldest job in the world, relegating the job of motherhood to merely what women exist for. But prostitution is also traditionally a job that those who practice it, take up due to force of circumstance. Most don’t choose to sell their bodies, they just have no other means of survival. At least they are paid, unlike rape victims. But like rape, prostitution is a result of men’s poor morals, not women’s.
Because men are not required to treat women as equals in so many aspects of our society, too many of them don’t. Until their perception that women are inferior is changed, there can be no fix.
Jo McRae is a qualified Library Technician, currently volunteer Librarian and editor for environmental groups. After her daughter’s death age 26 in 2012 she went to Indonesia to assist LePMIL, Linda’s NGO, to finish her environmental movie project in Sulawesi. This has led Jo to studying Indonesian at University. With fluent Bahasa Indonesia (!!!) Jo will return to Sulawesi to continue Linda’s work. For more information see Kendari Dreaming blog. To donate to the Linda McRae Dreaming Fund see Heaven Address http://www.heavenaddress.com.
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You may be interested in the work of NORMAC - Nordic Model Australia Coalition - this Australian network is currently working on stopping legalisation of brothels in Tasmania and support for the introduction of Nordic model laws on prostitution across Australia. Website is at normac.org.au
There is a growing body of evidence that has shown that legalisation of the sex industry has increased harms to women not prevented them as is often promotedby sex industry advocates. The European Womens Lobby is doing excellent work to promote gender equality and womens rights on every front possible - nothing comparable to this lobby group here in Australia - why is this so for a country, next to New Zealand that has the most failed legalised sex industry in the world?
I sometimes wish I had a better grasp of the dialectic and language to make my point. Drawing the bow between gender equality and prostitution seems quite easy. I can see the author’s point - but.
Gender equality has never been truly defined in a way that appears to be palatable to both of sexes (let’s overlook the possibility that there are actually 3, maybe, 4 sexes out here).
What I see from my admittedly male perspective is a combination of ego and personality. Growing up I was told to “go out and find a girlfriend” as if they were a commodity that could be found in the shelves of a supermarket. I still hear people talking about partners and children as “mine” like they’re property rather than individuals in their own right. How do we get around the fact that, as much as we try to reach out, each and every one of us is an island that no one else can truly see into?
For me it’s about respect. But, hey, I start “respecting” a woman and then get told to “harden up”. Where’s the middle ground?
2# Respect for ‘people’ is important. If anyone tells you to “harden up” I would question what underpins their motives. What makes you think that finding a “middle ground” is either the right or only answer? Middle ground or the game of ‘compromise’ is usually a position that people arrive at when denial of the facts is at its peak.
#3
Yes, but the game of “ego” is why we’re at where we’re at today.
I’m better than you are becomes I’m better than you are because which devolves to a number of obvious reasons - one of them being sex. And women practice it just as much as men.
The premise of this story/article was about gender equality - yes?
So, when I say “middle ground” I don’t ACTUALLY mean “compromise”. I just don’t have a one word phrase that encompasses mutual respect and understanding coupled with the ability to comprehend and work with the differences without abusing them. We’re talking dreamtime here.
Do you?
Care.
Uh, uh
Care implies a position of superiority. It’s on a par with sympathy. Both are good words but do not describe, to me at least, that which I’m trying to.
Care to try another? :)
Gang rape happens in the ‘Western World’ but does not create the same outrage that it did in the world media. Rebecca Solnit has written an article that looks at the horror of violence against women in America, which is probably similar in Australia: http://www.tomdispatch.com/blog/175641/
and scroll down to A Rape a Minute: A Thousand Corpses a Year.